I wake up feeling drowsy. Had a good session with dear.
But we have violated our 1 month bet for 3 times now.
Sigh! No determination. Must change. Must wake up early too.
Punctuality is a key attitude to success.
Then I felt troubled and bad. Had a minor row with mom. My fault.
Didn't communicate properly to keep 2 moon cakes for mom's prayers.
Starting to feel worried for the new venture soon. Nepal trip coming up.
Yet no excitement felt. Probably I don't like the financial insecurity I am feeling now.
Mom's minor car accident. My own car service. Car insurance + road tax. Nepal trip.
Need deposits for rental and utilities.
Need to have some spare cash ready for whatever travel required by work.
So many unforeseen costs. Bank account balance is dwindling fast.
I hate this feeling. Friend posted this:
One can only rely on oneself because even one's shadow leaves oneself during darkness.
Sounds negative but rings true.
No matter how special that person is to you,
you can't expect him or her to be on the same frequency as you all the time.
How good if I am able to be a typical lady. How good if I am in a typical relationship.
How good if I control my EQ.
So many uncertainties. What causes it? Can it be due to my own thinking?
Don't attach to a thought when it comes to the mind. Easier said than done.
I am worried about planting seed of doubt into my upcoming venture.
Just felt like giving up suddenly and lead a super stable life.
Don't give up, Pheo. New path usually looks harder. Few months later... sap sap sui la!
Persevere. Your choice. Your path. Be an adult. Live up to it. Bear with it.
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