Being Positive

I got this email earlier on and would like to share it out, a bit lengthy but that's always my style all this while. Read it, let it sink in, then choose how you want to start your day tomorrow. I agree with the saying that 'Attitude is everything'...

A Motivational Story About Positive Thinking

Jerry is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!" He was a unique manager because he had several waiters who had followed him around from restaurant to restaurant.

The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?" Jerry replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, Jerry, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood.

I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested. "Yes, it is," Jerry said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live life."

I reflected on what Jerry said. Soon thereafter, I left the restaurant industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that Jerry did something you are never supposed to do in a restaurant business: he left the back door open one morning and was held up at gun point by three armed robbers. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found relatively quickly and rushed to the local trauma centre. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body.

I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Wanna see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through this mind as the robbery took place. "The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door," Jerry replied. "Then, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could chose to live or I could choose to die. I chose to live."

"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked. Jerry continued, "... the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man.'

"I knew I needed to take action." "What did you do?" I asked. "Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said Jerry. "She asked if I was allergic to anything. 'Yes," I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Bullets!' Over their laughter, I told them, 'I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.' "

Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learnt from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.

Positive thinking is the first step towards a happy life. Attitude is everything.

Friendship Prevails After All!

I like to draw clear lines for things that happened in my life. Hence the rash decision to 'downgrade' my friend, as MY puts it the other day. But then later on, I found out that MY was right in the sense that I shouldn't jump into conclusion too fast. Perhaps I was really shocked. Later, I got the chance to meet this friend and can really feel her warmth. Luckily nothing happened. I was starting to wonder, since when am I so sensitive all of a sudden? Hate myself for being like that.

It was another week of gathering with friends and I mentioned before in a blog where I couldn't feel much chemistry with another friend anymore. Things have changed I guess. Now this made me wonder whether things change or I changed to be a more sensitive person. I don't know which one but I am glad to meet up with her again. Well, there are still things which I chose to conceal from her but decided to tell the other two friends. Can't help it. I felt more comfortable not sharing certain things with her. I know I am thinking too much. I am also wondering how on earth am I supposed to throw away this bad habit before it eats me up.

Well, what I want to say is this... It's not necessary to draw a clear line for everything that happened in life. Some things are better left on its own as time may change things. Sometimes things will heal by itself. And I must really remind myself not to take things too seriously. It happens each time I care too much. No wonder my friend said I can be crazy and serious at times. Learning how to make myself crazier? I also don't know lah. Janji now I am good with my own terms lah. Maybe I am too rigid, must learn to be more flexible a bit... flexible, flexible, flexible!

Simple, Free and Easy KL Trip

Finally I had visited KK. One more thing to get cancelled off my wish-to-do list! He was kind enough to offer me a place to stay over at his aunt's and he was really a gentleman. This is one trip which I enjoyed a lot as I can really be myself, speaking out my minds and blasting out stupid questions. Our plan went accordingly as planned with the exception of Skytrex trip being replaced with Templer's Park.

Templer's Park was an easy hike with leeches sticking upright vertically, waiting to prey on our succulent supply of blood. Surprisingly, we were the only one there hiking. No one else, didn't even bumped into anyone else. Met his friends, Dan and James from his own pool of UK friends. Also met Jared and Marcus from his pool of TMO friends. Nice to know that they were both into hiking. Too bad I wasn't staying in KL, otherwise I would have bugged them for hiking trips!

Played at the waterfall. There was this small pool where the current is very strong. Your pants will get pulled down if you don't hold on tight to it, that's how strong it was. Even felt like you would be sucked towards the back. It was inconvenient for me to play in waterfall just like that because I can't change clothes on the spot, like the guys did. Just had to bear with it, dried up a little bit then change clothes at the toilet at the entrance. Public toilet in KL is expensive, 50 cents per entry! Ridiculous!

Our next stop was Batu Caves, finally I got here! I counted the steps to reach the top and yes, it's exactly 272 steps as claimed. But later on my colleague told me that there were numbers indicating number of steps there, but I didn't notice it at all. Not even KK noticed it. Some people said it is smelly there and I was actually preparing to be knocked out by the smell once I reached the top but to my surprise, there wasn't any nasty smell or what so ever. KK said it was because there was lesser devotees. Things might be different on Thaipusam as there will be throngs of devotees applying the coconut or peanut oil which gives out the strong smell. Don't even know if I should count myself lucky or not.

There was this Dark Cave Tour as well but with the entrance fee costing >RM50, both of us decided to forego it. And I saw Daphne Iking (superb beauty) and Henry Golding (handsome) there too. They must be filming something. Daphne was sweet and friendly because I was asking KK if I can just walk across the steps and she was the one who answered me with a Yes! before she accidentally dropped her smartphone. Poor lady! KK and I sat in front of the Dark Cave Tour counter as it was so cooling and nice to chat there. None of us really wanted to leave that place if not for our growling stomachs.

There were many stalls selling 'pakora', an Indian delicacy resembling 'cucur udang or jagung'. Size is bigger and there were spices in it. Each stall has different recipe so you will taste different tastes from different stalls. I somehow couldn't really remember how to pronounce it properly. At one point, I called it 'pokara' instead of 'pakora'. KK rolled his eyes with lots of ??? on his head. We had a good laugh out of it. I found a way to remember it afterwards. Just remember 'pagoda', then I won't call it 'pokara' anymore! And due to my excitement on 'pakora' I forgot to donate blood. Stupid KK forgot to remind me also.

Later on we head off to Little India in Jalan Brickfields. I didn't know that Little India = Jalan Brickfields. KK made me walk all the way from KL Central to Brickfields. He really loved walking. Actually I don't mind walking but I purposely stirred up some noise just to irritate him slightly. You get to see many things when you take the time to walk and observe your surroundings. Of course this can only be done when you have the time. So each time I get the chance to do this, I will quietly appreciate it. The luxury of doing this is beyond words, though it was scorching hot and dusty out there.

Bugged KK to go to Times Square to try out the theme park. Again, the exorbitant price stopped us from proceeding. At ticket price of >RM50 and very little thrilling rides, I don't feel that it was worth the price. The theme park was almost deserted. Not many people at all. Again, I missed out the theme park ride. Last round I didn't get to play at the theme park when I visited Genting during Christmas also. I don't care, I must make sure this year I get to go to the theme park at least once! Universal Studio perhaps?

The next morning we headed off to Taman Tasik Titiwangsa. We woke up early for two mornings in a row. It was a very big and fun park to hang out in. There was plenty of space for you to have your picnic. And yes, our husband material KK packed up a nice snack to be enjoyed there. I would have fallen in love with him if only he is not my best friend, haha! KK and MY, please don't faint when you read this. I can't remember when was the last time I actually sat on the grass talking freely. Heavenly, really! Water fountains  there were marvellous and I even argued with KK that I saw coral in the lake. KK might be right when he said that it couldn't be coral but I insisted on my point anyway! 

There was even a remote-controlled car circuit, which really looked like a mini-F1 circuit. It was fun seeing the cars flew up high when they bumped into some obstacles or crashed due to too sharp or too fast a turn. The park was very well-maintained, especially the gym and playgrounds. And it feels nice to know that people still go out for outdoor activities during weekends. But I didn't see many Indians (most likely busy with Thaipusam) and young Chinese (most likely busy with their sleep or electronic gadgets). Does this mean that Malays are way healthier? Probably! And they are definitely closer to nature. It's evident when you see that usually it's the Malays who head to the park for picnic and family activities. I salute them for that, knowing how to enjoy the gift by mother nature!

I took Air Asia flight and Skybus for the journey from Penang to KK's place. Also tried other forms of public transportation such as the city bus, and LRT. Before this I had only taken the monorail and KTM. It had been a while I hadn't taken any public bus so this is one trip which I really loved, because I am doing something very different from what I will normally do. KK is leading a very simple life. And by embracing his way of life for the past few days, I find that it was a satisfying way to lead a life. All the best to you buddy! Love you so much!

And it is during this trip which I had actually managed to finish up two issues of Reader's Digest. Of course not reading the whole thing while in his house. It was done from the moment I started my journey from Penang to his place and before I left his place. But in the end, I left my spectacles at his place. Must have left it there when reading. Lucky I had my contact lens and old spectacles to spare me. I just can't understand, why must I always leave something behind each time I go to other people's place? So forgetful!

By the way, KK.... I simply loved the idea that you actually knocked the other man's knee to hint him in the monorail. I guess that was the most loving moment of the entire trip, wuhoo! And no, I wouldn't want to go your place to do reading again and to leave my spectacles there again. Thank you for the wonderful trip. I enjoyed it a lot. Please stop playing rummy 24/7 (slight exaggeration)! I love my life!

Do You Choose To Wear Mask In Front Of Others?

I don't. At least not with my close friends. But now I knew that no matter how close you are, never ever assume that you can face them without mask, unless you are 100% confident that you knew them inside out. No, I am not talking about betrayal or back stabbing. I am talking from my own experiences in which I was shocked with the reactions shown.

I am someone who cherish my friends, especially close friends and will go to great lengths to help them if I deem them as a worthy friend. Those who are close to me will know that. There is a saying which says "It take years to build trust but only a split second to destroy it." I couldn't agree more. Twice I face this kind of situation and the second time only happened so recently.

As for the first case, up until today I still couldn't make myself to accept the friend as we used to be anymore. People say "You can forgive but never forget". Really couldn't agree more. Not to say that we are small-hearted or short-sighted. But the feeling where you thought you are close friends but then the behaviour shows otherwise, those kind of feeling.... you need to be in it to experience the sharp pain in heart.

I am not in your situation so definitely I won't be able to fully understand your situation. When you spill out your problem, I expect to be helping in a way, especially moral support via advice etc. If you can't take it, then sorry lah and I had to apologise to prevent matters from getting worse. Please, to me close friends are those who dare to voice out the truth even though it sounds bitter. Truth are bitter.

Perhaps I am too straight forward or naive for not sensing the high sensitivity level of this close friend. I was really shocked with the response, really! The rest knew her pattern but I didn't and I do thank the rest for helping to console me and give me support from the back. Really timely. I should learn not to be so straight forward but WTH!

To be honest, I would rather die than to wear mask and reprocess and twist the words before I talk to my close buddies. So unreal man! I learnt my lesson the hard way. I had vowed to minimise giving out opinions where it concerns this friend. Better reduce any possible future conflicts. It was really nothing much to me anymore.

People say "It hurts because you care." True! But why bother when the other party didn't seem to care much anyway? Now I just had to overcome the "shock" I got. My fire of rage started after I read a sentence from her, something which a real close friend won't write. Really don't give face. She might have written it out of rage but I won't write it to my close friend, seriously!

Damage had been done. Apology had been sent. If she can take it, just accept it. If cannot, then suit her la. The rest were worried if the coming gathering can still be arranged. I reassured them that there wasn't any problem from my side. I am OK to go ahead. I will just need to remind myself to talk less or talk crap, just to play safe.

It really hurts! Somehow reminds me of the shock and pain I felt back in high school years. Ouch! The gash wound was so deep since I was super duper naive that time. This round, it was really more to shock than hurt or anything. I had concluded that she is still my friend, but no longer the type of close friend I am looking for. I enjoyed talking to her but that's it....nothing else other than friend, from now onwards!

Can forgive but hard to forget. I will remind myself not to repeat the mistake, hopefully!

And no, I don't wear mask in front of my close friends. I am peeled naked in front of them, just like onions. But I do wear mask in front of the rest, those not categorised as my close friends and families.

Chinese New Year 2012 - Water Dragon Year

No posts in January. What does this mean? Certainly not because there wasn't much going on in my life. Yeah, life is a bit hectic and busy, with the CNY preparation and what not. 2011 passed by fast, but January passed by even faster.

What happened in January? Can't really recall much but I knew that there were several times where I had wanted to blog but couldn't, either due to lack of Internet connectivity or just too busy to pen in my thoughts.

1. Did my first ribbon biscuits. Done all by myself. Thought I bought too much dough and was quite sleepy and tired by the time everything was done. Later I realized that the ribbon biscuits I did was slightly bigger than usual and there are still plenty of them at home at this time of writing. That's how much I did. But I also learnt that some people do single layer while some people do double layer of doughs.

Some people cut only a vertical line in the middle while some will cut 3 vertical lines so that it will come out nicer. Quantity of oil and its temperature play a very important role. Some said put some salt into the oil to maintain high frying temperature for the biscuit but I feel that it's not that important. With or without salt is still alright.

2. This year CNY I didn't bother to arrange any gathering, be it for friends or families. We just let the flow go as it is. And it works. No rushing here or there. No FFK. No waiting. I love the CNY feel this year. Everyone was busy talking to each other, getting each other's update. Of course I got angpows and the amount was roughly the same as last year. And of course, you can't avoid the "jackpot question" of BF, marriage etc at my age. Just smiled and brushed it off. Managed to meet up with some friends and chatted leisurely. This is the first year I got angpow from my peers.

We hired people to repaint the house since it had been almost 5 years plus. Even on CNY eve the repainting was still ongoing and house was still messy with lots of house chores to be done. Mom went berserk and succumbed to the stress she kept bottled up within herself. Then only all of us fast fast do all those pending stuffs. In the middle of the rush, I accidentally dropped a broken vase on my toe. Slight deep gash on CNY eve. Later at night, it was swollen and walking was painful as pressure was applied on the toe. That night, I slept early and missed the fireworks since I couldn't do much while the rest of the house was bustling with activities. But I was the freshest on CNY morning since I had sufficient sleep while the rest didn't. Blessing in disguise?

3. Asked JS to accompany me to Serdang to send hamper to my XXT foster family. The fried porridge was no longer as good as the first time I tried and again I am disappointed because there wasn't mango kerabu. The mango was substituted with apple instead. Other than that, everything is OK. Lucky there wasn't much crowd when we arrived. It was only after our dishes arrive that the restaurant was full with people. Talked quite long with aunt, uncle, and the sisters. Very cordial and felt close to heart. Nice to keep in touch with them. Obviously they were surprised to see JS and I didn't properly introduce him but I knew they got the idea.

4. Had CNY dinner with colleagues. This year we ate poon choy, yee sang with two side dishes and two bottles of red wine. And karaoke session! Simply whack the microphone and sang. Out of tune or not, that is another story. Important thing is we enjoyed it so much. It was a dinner well served. I must say I like this poon choy. This Kim Hee Restaurant, near Sunway Carnival definitely did a good job with the food. The karaoke facilities need some improvement though. It was worth the wait all along. We pooled RM10 / pax monthly for this. Already we were wondering what to have for next year. Someone mentioned yi pin guo, though I don't know what is that. Will know next year CNY...

And speaking about red wine, I had a sudden affection for it. So far had only tried red wine and not white ones. I am starting to learn to drink red wine. And of course I can only drink sip by sip. That is how it was meant to be drank I suppose since you will have those spicy sensation in your throat if you drink too fast. At least that's the case for me. I am lucky that I have several wine drinkers amongst my friends. In fact, I had red wine for my birthday as well. Even during CNY, we opened 2 bottles of red wine to be shared with relatives. Am I already addicted? Hmm...

5. Happened that mom's birthday falls on third day of CNY. I am talking about our Gregorian calendar birthday ah. I boiled two red hard boiled eggs for mom. Forgot to tell mom not to eat the egg yolk since her cholesterol level was slightly high. But I guessed mom was very happy to see my red eggs and finished them off. Friend asked, how come I celebrate according to Western calendar but the way I started it was so traditional and conventional? Just for fun ma. It's really the thought that matters, after all. And mom really enjoyed her birthday though we didn't really plan anything. In fact mom was the one making the preparation for the steamboat on her birthday.

Of course I helped out with the preparation la, but minor role only loh. Told mom about JS in the kitchen. I had been wanting to tell mom but don't know when. Especially since friends scolded me for not informing mom. JS said I had the tendency to break out special and spicy news on people's birthday. Now that he mentioned it, it was indeed true. Haha! I am not sure if mom was surprised or not but I can sense her happiness upon hearing the news.

6. All in all, this is one of my favourite CNY celebration. I didn't buy much CNY clothing but I make sure I had a red tee to wear for CNY. As traditional or 'lao tu' as I might sound, I still think that CNY should be in red and CNY songs should be blasted loudly in order to bring out the festive atmosphere.

7. Yesterday marked the end of the 15 days of CNY. Went to Esplanade to throw mandarins. Even asked JS to come along. It was more fun than last year in the sense that we watched the show. Last year we went back very early so perhaps we missed out the fun. Too bad we didn't get to watch the LED dragon dance and the fireworks display since we went back after few drops of rain. Nevertheless, I enjoyed it a lot.  Both of us narrowly missed the baskets and 'plomp' went the mandarins into the sea. This was done symbolically only, as there is no way the gentlemen could 'fish' the mandarins unless they have a boat. I think most people just wrote down their wishes or drew some cute cartoons on the mandarins and threw it into the sea.

Pin said where got people bring BF to throw mandarins one? While Huei said I throw he pick lo. True also. Oh, they are so fun to hang out with seriously. Too bad that we are now all scattered in the north, central and south region of Malaysia.  By the way, do you know that Chap Goh Meh is also known as Chinese Valentine's Day? And no, we didn't celebrate it. We were merely enjoying and soaking in the CNY atmosphere. I think as long as you spend time together, it is already considered Valentine's? Gosh, can't believe I am saying this! Power of love, haha!

Wuhoo, Dragon Year CNY is real fun. Hope next year Snake Year CNY is the same too.

Gong Xi Fa Cai to everyone!