I read this article some time ago and I actually printed out the gist to remind me to blog about this. It might be from a book or an article titled Lessons for Marriage, Learnt from Divorce, not sure though but the source is from Yahoo News.
1. Show Your True Self
> accelerate the inevitable, afterall, it's all going to come out eventually.
> there's no valour in putting on a brave face, it's still a mask like an other.
> have a courage to be vulnerable.
2. Be Honest
> telling the truth is so much easier.
> every lie requires a lifetime of maintenance.
3. Be Alert
> don't paint the red flags white.
> complacency leads to avoidance > withdrawal > resentment > adultery > divorce.
4. Fight Fair
> getting along is easy but we need to learn how to fight fairly and productively.
> no point harping on past issues.
5. Make An Effort
> unconditional love it for children and pets.
> in romantic relationships, we need to earn it - and re-earn it - all the time.
> and that's a good thing.
6. Talk About Sex
> discuss the dirty.
> know each other's sexual boundaries.
> explore the fantasies, whatever they are, because if we don't, they're just going to get played out somewhere else.
7. Sweat The Small Stuff
> death by 1000 paper cuts is far more common than getting stabbed in the back.
> at some fundamental level we are what annoys us, so if something is bugging us, say it. Nicely.
8. Stay True To Yourself
> compromise is essential but too much can be dangerous.
> can't change who we are to please somebody else.
> nobody can do that for us.
> it's best to love with abandon, sure, but we can't abandon our self in the process.
9. Spouse Is Your Best Friend
> give them the space you would give a friend.
> give them the respect you would give a friend.
For a relationship to work, we need these:
love > trust > respect > commitment > compassion > communication
similar goals > kindness > honesty > consideration > compromise
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